It’s me Meredith, one of the 45,000 people you just followed on Twitter. I must admit, you are not my first celebrity Twitter follow. Judah Friedlander from 30 Rock (the guy with all the genius hats) popped my celebrity follow cherry on Twitter. But you my Twitter friend, are my second celeb follow which is still totally almost special.
I must admit that when I got the “Breaking news, Taye Diggs follows you on Twitter” email I did a little dance (it looked my kids do when they have to pee except I wasn’t holding my privates saying, “No I don’t have to pee.”) And then I told a few thousand of my friends that a big star was following me on Twitter. And you know what my few thousand friends said? They said, “Yeah, he’s following me too.”
At first I felt like the wind had been taken out of my social media sails. Because for a second there, I thought you following me made me special in a Sally Field “you like me, you really like me” sort of a way. And maybe it does. But then I saw on the Today show that you told Matt Lauer you were using Twitter as a ticker. I will admit, I wasn’t totally sure what that meant. So I assume it meant that when you want to know what’s happening in the world, you take to Twitter. Following a bunch of people is your way of taking the pulse of the nation.
You mentioned to Matt (whom you also follow on Twitter), that you gave a list of people to your social media guru which included athletes, politicians and actors whom you wanted him to follow for you on Twitter. I write a humor blog called BadSandy.com. You can imagine that I’ve rarely been bunched into the same category as Reggie Bush, Anna Kendrick and Deepak Chopra but here we all are together in the followed by you Twitter category, making me one degree of separation from some of the world’s most interesting people and them from me. So maybe it is still special to be one of Taye’s 45,000. So far it feels pretty good.
Taye, at first I questioned the validity of using Twitter as a pulse detector. I mean let’s face it. If you go on Twitter, aren’t you at best going to find out how many people just masturbated, how many moms just tried the latest juice cleanse and how many people saw The Interview, but still thought it sucked? Then I realized that is the pulse of the nation. And I think you’re really on to something.
So since you said you want to know what’s happening with your Twitter followers, I thought I’d tell you what’s really happening with me. In 120 characters or less. Hashtag, here we go:
- My husband has a cold proving he’ll do anything to avoid waking up in the morning with our kids.
- Winter break is nearly over. How did it go so fast? Why didn’t it go faster? My kids are adorable, just not everyday.
- This year two planes were lost at sea which makes me guilty for being so hard on my kid for constantly losing his shoes.
- I need knee replacement surgery from years of running making me the only woman in Los Angeles who will have old tits, but new knees.
- I was hoping that if North Korea was going to make it impossible for us to see one thing, it would have been the Kardashians.
- I’ll admit I’m still a bit heartbroken about you and Idina splitting up, but I know it was probably the quickest way for you to stop having to listen to “Let It Go.”
- I went to the gym this morning and was surrounded by January’s new recruits. The “New Year’s Resolutioners” if you will. I’ve never felt thinner. I now realize I don’t need to diet, I just need to go to the gym for the first five days after New Years. This is over 120 characters. But since the Twitter police aren’t here, we’re in good shape.
- My son loved “Into The Woods” proving you’re never too young to think you could sing Stephen Sondheim better than the person who is.
- Just yesterday a total stranger called me young lady. His eyesight was questionable, but I took the compliment regardless. Delusion is ageless and so am I.
- My New Year’s resolution was to eat healthier and be more patient with my children. That lasted a good ten minutes. I’m so glad that’s over.
So Taye now that you know what’s going on with me, what’s going on with you? You’ll be surprised how much you can reveal in 120 characters that have a shelf life of 60 seconds.
Hashtag: Thanks for the follow,
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