BS Rules On Etiquette & Manners

BS Rules On Manners & Etiquette:

 

It’s poor form to brag. Instead, allow others to compliment you then graciously respond, “I know.” 

                                                                                                                                                                      xo, BS

-When flying, eliminate uncertainty and sneeze directly on your neighbor leaving them no question as to whether or not they’ll arrive sick.

-When using a public restroom with no seatcovers available, urinate directly on the floor. It’s poor manners to sprinkle the seat.

-It’s unkind to speak poorly of others behind their backs. When criticizing friends and family, make sure to do it directly to their face.

-Judging the weight gain of one you don’t like isn’t kind. Noticing the weight gain of one you don’t like and telling others is conversation.

-Never judge a book by it’s cover. But do judge a child by it’s parents.

-When running into an ex, resist the temptation to brag about your life now. You’ll have more fun sincerely asking, “I’m sorry. Who are you?”

-It’s impolite to break wind in public. When faced with the need, release it quietly while making a horrified look in a stranger’s direction.

-Wash your hands right after using the powder room, unless you’re dining with someone you don’t like. Then a wash-free handshake is in order.

-Whispering isn’t kind. When speaking poorly about others in public, look to see if they’re nearby. If so, speak up so they can hear you.

-After receiving a gift, it’s customary to write a thank you note. After receiving a bad gift, it’s customary to send the gift back.

-Always say please and thank you, especially to your childless relatives of questionable sexual orientation whose will could go to you.

-Instead of greeting your spouse at the end of the day with a list of criticism, plan a night out with friends and complain about him then.
-Everyday is precious. It’s important to let family know how you really feel about them. Keep a list of their flaws and reference it often.
-Dinner party invitees may ask, “What can I bring?” Graciously decline. Then at the end of dinner, place a bill next them & wait for payment.
-When god gives you lemons, make lemonade. When you can’t find a babysitter, leave your children home alone.
-Keep a tidy home by cleaning closets often. Toss anything, even what fits. With the proof you really do have nothing wear, go shopping.
-Children respond to positive feedback. Acknowledge your child’s accomplishments by saying, “Congratulations, you’re not as bad as before.”
-If a friend asks if their three children are included in a dinner invite, be inclusive. Say, “Sure, the nice one is…”
-Compliment a friend whose found success after struggle. Say, “Your family must be so happy to stop referring to you as, my son the failure.”
-Compliment a friend’s recent weight loss by acknowledging that they look less fat than they used to.
-Another nice thing to say to a new lover is something thoughtful like, “The only way it could have been better is if you weren’t there.”

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